It was there, in the grocery store, that I saw her. Not the regular grocery store, but the uppity one that sells Devonshire cream and somewhat decent scones. She was pushing a shopping cart filled with two adorable, well dressed little boys. She was wearing an engagement ring the size of Jupiter. She was carrying a Balenciaga bag. And she was wearing the lace-print Valentino wellies.
I wanted to be her.
This has happened to me many times in my life. Passing by, I see a woman who can do what I cannot (in this case – wear an engagement ring, carry around cute children, and afford a Balenciaga bag). I want to be her – I want to emulate some part of her that I see as perfect.
This doesn’t come from a lack of self esteem – quite the contrary. I have particularly high self esteem. But I realize that within myself there are things I want to improve. If we are not improving ourselves, we are doing a disservice to how wonderful we are. I know I have weaknesses, so I work to make them stronger.
I also know that this woman’s life is far from perfect. She has struggles, just like I do. She has memories she would like to forget. She has bills to pay. She gets mud on her fabulous lace-print Valentino wellies.
When I see a woman and say, “Gosh, I want to be her” I know exactly what it is. It’s her style, her faith, her contentment, her attitude, her outlook on life. It’s something about her that I know I could improve on within myself.
Often (VERY often), I say to myself “I want to be Kate.” Because she’s a princess, she’s happily married, she’s thin, her closet is amazing, she is doing good within this world, she is patient, she doesn’t yawn during church.
You might notice that our first book this year for Regal Reads is entitled “I Want to be Her” – this is no coincidence. I think we all have that moment, in the grocery store, at the mall, in the park, where we see a weakness in ourselves mirrored in a person who has a strength. Andrea Linett’s book talks about all the people she wanted to be – and how they shaped her.
So, this year instead of resolutions, I’m setting role models. I’m finding women and saying “I Want to be her” – and focusing on being the part of her that I love so much. Here are my role models:
- Catherine, the Duchess of Cambridge: Catherine is a perfect example of who I want to be. I want to make people stop and say “that girl is a lady.” I’m going to treat my body like a princess’ body deserves to be treated. I’m going to dress like a princess. I’m going to act like a princess. (I will not yawn in church)
2. Giselle from Enchanted: Everytime I watch Enchanted, I am taken by how goodhearted and sweet Giselle is. Perhaps this is because she is a cartoon character, but wouldn’t it be lovely if we were all that sweet? If we trusted in the beauty of life, and the goodness in people – the way Giselle does – the world would take notice.
3. The girl in the Valentino wellies: Because she inspired me, and I would like to inspire someone, someday, too.
Who do you want to be?
xo The Heiress